Sexually-healing massage Brighton

Trauma disconnects us from our bodies. From our pleasure. From the freedom to feel what we feel, without shame, fear, or collapse.

Many of my clients arrive here not because they’re "broken," but because their experiences have stolen something vital: the sense that their body belongs to them.

That’s what real sexual healing is about.

Not just orgasms, but ownership. Not just arousal, but agency.

At SkinMap, I guide you back into the felt sense of your body - gently, consensually, and with deep reverence.

This work is about restoring what trauma or disconnection has taken:

• The ability to feel and express what’s truly going on inside
• The safety to relax into the present moment
• The capacity to open your heart, without fear of being overwhelmed

Recovery means re-establishing self-leadership. And here, that begins with touch - skilled, sacred, attuned to you.

This isn’t just massage. It’s an invitation to come home to yourself. It’s erotic embodiment, not for performance, but for healing.

Whether you're navigating past sexual trauma, grief, shame, or simply a numbness you can’t explain - this work meets you where you are.

Because you deserve to feel safe in your skin. Because pleasure, when it flows from safety, heals.

In his book The Feeling Of What Happens, neuroscientist Antonio Damasio explores the foundational role the body plays in our sense of self. He shows how our internal sensations, "primordial feelings", are the true foundation of emotional awareness. These sensations, which arise from the brainstem, give us direct, wordless insight into our state of being - from pleasure to pain, hunger to arousal.

When we are disconnected from these signals  due to trauma, stress, or long-standing emotional neglect  we may feel dissociated, numb, or emotionally lost. For many, this shows up as what I call a sexual block, a barrier that stops us from fully enjoying our erotic selves.

This is where the kind of trauma-informed, sensual massage I offer becomes a deeply therapeutic practice. Informed by thinkers like Damasio, Bessel van der Kolk, and Betty Martin, and inspired by my own journey from software analyst to erotic bodyworker, I help clients reconnect with their innate erotic intelligence.

I've spent years developing a unique, intuitive, and respectful approach to erotic touch that centres you, your comfort, your boundaries, your healing process.

I’ve worked with over 200 clients of all genders, backgrounds, and orientations, including those who were previously untouched (e.g. for religious reasons), those who had never experienced an orgasm with another, those healing after loss, and those exploring new aspects of their sexual identity. The testimonials speak for themselves.

As I explain on my About Me page, I’m a trained sensual masseur, trauma-aware, pansexual, body-positive, and deeply committed to helping others awaken their sexual self-awareness through skilled, consensual touch.

You’re not alone in feeling out of sync with your sexuality.

Together, we can create a space where it becomes safe, and even joyful,  to reconnect.

The session length depends upon your service selection and may be extended by agreement. 

We must work to build a trusting, relaxed, anticipatory atmosphere in the room before the touching starts, and so it is really important that we follow a path that invites us into a state of physical attunement.

When you physically arrive, I use a guided meditation to help your mind to "arrive" with your body, into the safe space of my room; for us both to be fully present, with awareness, in the moment, together.  

We then do some intention-setting, eye-gazing and gradual (clothed) negotiation of touch and agree how we will transition to you being naked. This bit can also involve a short Belly2Belly-style meditation lying on a mattress, if it feels right.

We agree our boundaries and which of those are more are "fluid" (open for further check-in and agreement during your orgasmic excitement phases (I do not intend to follow you, obviously, and that will have been agreed already).

We discuss and agree and what our unique communication preferences will look like during the massage. Humans have complex and unique "languages" of sensual/sexual pleasure that need to be understood by people we are in intimate connection with and, often your blocks will be related to an absence of such "love-making" language in relationships. We discuss:

• Spoken words (including "dirty-talk") that you enjoy or dislike
• Vocal sounds of appreciation/dislike such as moans or gasps
• Safe words to be used to pause or even stop completely
• Movements you instinctively make such as writhing and grinding
• Gestures with your hands
• Hand grips in response to me holding your hand
• How you feel about your natural lubrication, squirting and/or ejaculation
• You watching me as I touch you
• Touching and/or caressing me

I then invite you to transition to nakedness in the way you have chosen to and you will end up face down on the table, covered with a blanket to begin. I then gradually begin the hands-on work, starting with a series of trust-building, grounding massage techniques over the blanket. From there, touch becomes increasingly intimate with the blanket eventually being slowly dragged off to reveal your nakedness and you will hopefully welcome that vulnerability by then.

I awaken your senses at your pace by really tuning in to your responses and, in many ways, it is a very connected journey together where I have the added responsibility of ensuring that I am serving your needs, not my own, and that I am holding a safe space for you throughout. That is critical to your mind and body being able to open to my touch, and especially when I eventually and mindfully start to massage your genital region.

By mindfully manipulating your whole genital region, inside and out, I help to break down your mind and body's resistance to orgasmic release. The well-proven theory behind this process is that we have created the ideal conditions under which you are able to bring innocent curiosity to the places where your embodied responses manifest, without triggering the unhelpful state(s) that normally accompany them. It is exactly the same science behind other PTSD (post traumatic stress) talking therapies and the emerging mainstream acceptance of the power of guided psychedelic therapy. We have just lowered the unhelpful armour that has developed in response to intimate touch to allow your brain to start making new pleasure paths!😍

We finish with a "closing" talk where we reflect upon how it felt, any emotions that arose (both difficult or pleasurable), and discuss where we agree and disagree about the dynamic. We identify areas and things that I did with my hands that felt pleasurable so that you can start to make a map of your genital region that you can use to better understand and communicate. This authentic sharing is key to integration afterwards for you because you will need to make a plan as to how you will continue your practice afterwards through solo self-pleasure and/or with a lover.

The effects are usually long-lasting after just one session although you may consider booking a series of appointments, depending upon the outcome of each.